School of elephants
My son sees a school of elephants on TV
I know they are a herd
He laughs at a silly small monster with pointy knees
I know the creature's a bird
He asks me to get the map
So we can find out how to go
To the special magical place
Where we're always together
And it's always funny and fun, like today
That moment
I try to unlearn what I know.
“Tired is my middle name.”*
Back when my second child was a baby I’d never have thought that, almost six years on, I’d still be sleep deprived. There are at least four big differences now – my resilience is worn down, I’m working and not on maternity leave, my son can walk, and he can struggle and argue about why he won’t go back to sleep. For about two years now we have lived with the likely prospect that every night, somewhere around 3.00am, we will be woken by a little voice saying ‘I’m scared’, or some variation thereof. Last night was the clincher – I haven’t been back to sleep since 3.30am – and it’s time to seek help. We’ve tried everything – the usual reassurance and cuddles, soft music, a nightlight, dream catcher, crystals, meditation CD – and I’m horrified to say that nothing has worked! I’m heading for a helpline right now!
* © from Being Mummy by Anne‑marie Taplin published April 2007