Edges of me


When I’m exhausted
the world seems flat
my kids annoying, my husband useless
the day too daunting.

I want to scream “leave me alone!”
and retreat like a bear
to a deep, dark cave
until my wintery mood passes.

My elastic band of love
snaps painfully back as
I think and feel and sometimes say
those things I know are not OK.

And with each passing moment
life offers me the chance to dance and love again
the sun’s warmth, my daughter’s joy
an endless invitation to step out of the void.

Sometimes I fight the fight
that later makes no sense
to stay exhausted, deluded
to show those I love the edges of me I despise.

And sometimes I surprise myself
And emerge from my exhaustion
like a lotus from the mud.

I open to the sun and the
Love that surrounds me
Effortless and Beautiful.
Anything is possible.

 

© Lyndal Edwards

“A gender-equal society would be one where the word ‘gender’ does not exist: where everyone can be themselves.”*

I’ve always been aware of gender conditioning and actively tried to combat any lingering prejudices or stereotypes in my own parenting, even down to encouraging dolls with my boys when they were little. It’s great to read people writing about gender issues they’re experiencing with their kids. For too long these subjects have been discouraged or silenced. I’d love to publish some more creative writing on this topic, especially if you are struggling with a child who actively tries to move away from gender normative preferences. A society where everyone can be themselves – thanks Gloria for those aspirational words.

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* Gloria Steinem